Hank Remington, The Cowboy Diplomat

Silver-tongued heel who weaponized verbosity and handshake betrayals across the Great Plains Territory from 1980-1993. Never used one word when twenty would do.

Joshua Schairbaum

Joshua Schairbaum

— 2 min read
Hank Remington, The Cowboy Diplomat
"I believe in fair play and a six-shooter!"

BASIC INFORMATION

Ring Name: "Cowboy Diplomat" Hank Remington
Nickname(s): The Diplomat, The Silver-Tongued Talent
Origin: Lubbock, Texas
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 235 lbs
Finishing Move: The Six-Shooter (theatrical superkick)

CHARACTER PROFILE

Background

Debuted in Great Plains Territory in 1980 as a smooth-talking "gentleman" who claimed to settle disputes with "fair play and a six-shooter." Reality was different - he was a master manipulator who used diplomatic language to gaslight opponents. His signature move was extending elaborate handshakes before cheap shots. Famous for 10-minute promos that talked in circles until nobody knew what they'd witnessed. Never broke character, maintaining a benevolent smile even while delivering brutal attacks. Only tell was a microscopic left-eye twitch before cheap shots.

Personality Traits

  • Verbose to weaponized degree
  • Calculating and patient heel worker
  • Master gaslighter
  • Obsessed with maintaining diplomatic facade

PRESENTATION

"Allow me to negotiate..."

Physical Appearance

6'2", 235 lbs with lean "Hollywood muscle" build. Immaculately feathered sandy blonde hair with Aqua Net hold. Steel-blue eyes, clean-shaven, angular jaw. TV-ready tan.

In-ring: Cream tights with turquoise/burnt orange geometric patterns. Brown Tony Lama boots with turquoise stitching. Cream silk robe with "DIPLOMAT" embroidery. Longhorn belt buckle (often used as weapon). Street: Tailored Western shirts, pressed Wranglers, cream Stetson with turquoise band, lizard-skin boots, bolo tie. Carried brown leather "Diplomatic Briefcase" (contained brass knuckles).

Ring Style

Psychology-heavy with extensive stalling. Basic technical wrestling (arm drags, headlocks) with running commentary. Dirty tactics: The Negotiator (sleeper with whispered threats), False Treaty (handshake-to-clothesline), Diplomatic Immunity (hidden low blow), briefcase shots. Finishing move setup was theatrical gun gesture before superkick. Matches followed pattern: stall early, flash wrestling ability when pressed, desperate cheating late, always found way to make finish look accidental.

AUDIENCE CONNECTION

Catchphrases

  • "Now partner, let's talk this through like civilized men..."
  • "I believe in fair play and a six-shooter!"
  • "Allow me to negotiate..."

Fan Interaction

Generated pure frustration heat. Verbose promos had fans yelling "GET ON WITH IT!" Telegraphed handshake setups made crowds scream warnings. Would "negotiate" with hostile fans in condescending way. Kids hated him with pure hate. Adults found him insufferable but couldn't look away. Talked for 45 minutes at an Oklahoma City house show, causing near-riot. Would insist on shaking hands with ring crew after wins while music played.

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